Ms. Garrett Writes a Book
It has happened. The planets have aligned. My taste for trashy biographies and my bizarre fascination with the Facts of Life girls have merged into one book. The disappointment is that it has been written, but not yet published.
I beg you, publishers. Snap this up. Now. It will be worth it for the Lisa Whelchel dirt alone.
PS: Charlotte, please include some dirt on Lisa Whelchel. Or at least on cousin Geri.
Read this very important news story here.
Lisa Whelchel will be included in the new cast of Survivor, a show I have always managed to avoid. Now I will have no choice but to watch it.
And then I will sob to myself, because I am sad.
You don’t even want to know what would happen to me if Joyce Dewitt ever turned up on that show.
I started to title this entry “Coolest 80’s Songs,” but then realized that isn’t much fun. That’s been done before. I decided to create this list as a sort of musical Rorschach test. I wrote down the first ten 80’s songs that jumped to mind, and then ranked them according to how much I used to play them over and over as a kid.
I rarely had money to buy actual albums as a kid, but I did have a small boombox and a lot of blank cassettes. I would record a song off the radio, and then play it endlessly until I wished it didn’t exist anymore. Today, there is no need for that, as the radio performs that function just fine (for example: Adele, Carly Rae Jepsen, and that “Moves Like Mick Jagger” song).
I found it very interesting that none of the bands I consider my 80’s favorites turned up in this list (Erasure, New Order, The Smiths, or The Cure). I also deliberately left out cool 80’s groups and/or songs that were big in the 80s but which I didn’t come to love until later (Siouxsie and the Banshees, Alphaville). Many songs I chose are one hit wonders. Many just resonate with me for various reasons, or bring back specific memories.
I suggest anyone else try this. Write down 10 songs from any period off the top of your head. Then try to figure out why you chose them. It’s fun! Or at least it’s fun to me…
I am both a sci-fi dork and a child of the 80s. Finding this made me wet my pants with excitement.
I am not usually big on musical theater, but do admit to a fascination both with Evita and Patti Lupone (mostly because she played Corky’s mom on “Life Goes On” in the 80s).
Let me state that I am not accusing her of being drunk here, as I don’t want to be sued. So let’s just say she sounds “off.”
If you can watch this without laughing so hard you lose bladder control, there is something wrong with you.
I am unable to write anything else this evening. I’m afraid the existence of this song on Youtube may rip a hole in the fabric of space-time and suck us all into Hell.
I am going to lie down now.